The Foster Care System...x50

We have been exploring the option to adopt from the Foster care system, however the responses we have received to our inquiries have not been positive, leaving us to wonder if it is at all possible for us to adopt from Foster Care while remaining in Korea. We are are prayerfully considering the option of adopting while residing in America. This would mean (after a period of saving and saving) we would move to a U.S. State and adopting within that State's Foster care system.

So now this give us 50 different systems to look at and determine which State's system will both meet our needs as well as the needs of the child being placed for adoption. Like the ad above says "You don't have to be a perfect person" Similarly there is not going to be one perfect State system. Each State offers different (for lack of better words) pros and cons to adopting. For instance some states don't offer a Foster-to-Adopt program and you first become a licensed Foster Parent and then if the child's parental rights are terminated (TPR) then you have first choice to adopt.

Oregon is one of the "better" States to work with for the ease of an adoption. They have a great case-worker network, state funding for the adoption, and great post-placement services for both you and the child. But other States offer a variety of different positive aspects. Florida, for example, offers a tuition waiver for Foster care and Foster adopted kids, to attend any of their State's Universities, Community Colleges or Vocational Schools. Hawaii, while offering an average amount of support for adoptions through Foster Care also mandates that any employer with full-time employees must provide health insurance. Hawaii is also one of the best States if you want an open adoption as the birth records are not sealed. (As an aside, a big thumbs up to Hawaii for revamping their Foster Care system and getting it back on track when, just a little more than 10 years ago, it was one of the worst systems in the United States.) Utah has one of the highest percentages of adoptions through Foster Care. Also we need to consider our network of support in both Texas and Oregon/Washington.

Having said all this, it is our firm belief that Foster Care is supposed to be a temporary placement and the overall goal should be a safe reunification for kids and their parents or relatives. Sometimes though, this is just not possible. That is where families who are willing to adopt step into the picture. It is a great desire of our hearts to not just add a child to our family, but to save, help, shelter, love and nurture a child in need. We believe this is what God has called us to do and that is why we were initially looking at adopting through an orphanage and are now considering Foster Care. However the dive into the Foster Care System has been a little daunting with each State having different requirements and regulations. One of the most beneficial links we have found has been through Focus on the Family at

http://www.icareaboutorphans.org/StateAdoptionRequirements.aspx

other helpful links are

http://www.adoptionservices.org/adoption_special/adoption_foster_care.htm and

http://fostercareadoption.us/index.php

We are in the process of educating ourselves about our options and opportunities right now. We have not made any solid decision-just gathering information. The more information we have, the more we have to pray about and seek God's guidance. We are going to try to narrow down our State options to about 10 and then take an extremely close look at those States' Foster Care Systems. We ask that you will continue to pray for us and for clarity of information as well as the continued guidance of God.

The "Maybe" Option

Ok so for the past week or more we have been working on a possible 5th option. We may possibly be able to adopt from the U.S. Foster care system for waiting children. There are several agencies and non-profits that seem to have programs for both Foster care and families living abroad. So far we've found:

The Adoption Exchange http://www.adoptex.org/site/PageServer

AdoptAbroad

http://adopt-abroad.com/ Illien Adoption International http://www.illienadoptions.org/ VIDA http://www.vidaadoptions.org/

there is also AdoptUSKids http://www.adoptuskids.org/

These are who we are looking at right now. We have checked out their websites, contacted all of them, and even received an introduction email from a few of them. The problem is we have no more answers to any of our questions than we did two weeks ago. It seems just when we get in contact with someone they pass us off to another agency or social worker. Most of this is confusion about our situation. This echoes back to the "we are from a Hague convention country but are currently in a non-Hague convention country" part of our previous post. We know that if we adopt from the United States, it will be considered a domestic adoption, however many people either think it will be an international adoption or that we will have to follow Hague Convention guidelines. We do believe it is possible to adopt from Foster care and continue to being missionaries in South Korea. But How much will it cost? Will the government pay for some of the expenses as if we lived in America? Who will conduct our Home Study? Who would do our post-placement evaluations? Does it matter from which State we reside? How long will we need to stay in America? What is the time frame for the adoption process? Do we need a separate attorney or agency? Is it actually possible to adopt from the Foster care system if we live overseas and are non-military? Do we need South Korea's permission to adopt and if so do we need to fulfill their adoption requirements as well? After having placed several calls and countess emails, and again ending up with more questions than answers, we are wondering if we should be looking at some of the former options. Perhaps it's time to give Randy another call.

So for the many of you who have asked and even more of you who are praying, that is where we are at right now. I wish I could give a solid clear answer, but the fact of the matter is, we don't have one...yet. so we'll keep praying and trusting in God's perfect timing.

The Adoption Options

So this is where we are in our journey. We don't know. We are not lost, we know we are going to adopt a child, but we have several options before us. In a very dry and basic form they (in no particular order) are:

1) an independent (no agency) adoption from Ukraine. This would be a boy or girl age 5 or older and most likely with minor special needs (special needs is a very loose term we'll talk about later) We would be adopting a child out of a state run orphanage. An older child would be a more difficult transition for Abby.

2) A non-Hague adoption from South Korea, this sounds great because we are already living here but it is a huge commitment especially if we continue our ministry in Korea. The reason this is such a big deal is because adoption in Korea in general is not looked upon favorably and most families that adopt move to another city where no one knows they have adopted children. Our child would not have this option because, well, we aren't Korean and we don't look Korean.

3) A domestic adoption. This would be an adoption through a U.S. agency. (Yes I was supposed to use "a" there and not "an.") This type of adoption would be an infant adoption where a birth-mother chooses us to be the adoptive parents to her child. furthermore it would range from an open adoption to semi-open adoption to closed adoption.

4) Our family moves back to America, where we pursue a foster-to-adopt option. This would mean taking part in a state foster care system and eventually adopting a child that is a match with our family and is eligible for adoption. This is the least expensive type of adoption, however it can be emotionally draining as you love and let go non-adoptable children.

So that is where we are right now. We are taking it slow and are in continual prayer over the issue. We would like to send a special thanks to the folks that have taken the time to talk with us and who have been so very patient with all our many questions. I have to say though it is an understatement, adoption is complicated. We spent over an hour on the phone with a social worker named Jim McMahon from San Antonio, TX (1:30 am our time) who very patiently went through these different options with us and helped clarify some questions about our living overseas. So for now we pray and we ask all of you to join with us in prayer for the continued guidance and providence of God.

The Hague Headache

The Hague Convention on the Protection of Children and Co-operation in Respect of Intercountry Adoption, known as "the Hague Convention" is an international agreement between countries that is designed to protect children adopted across national boundaries. This is a fantastic agreement to help stop child abductions and child trafficking - however it's downside is that it is steadily decreasing the number of international adoptions. With more than 75 countries as members, the tighter restrictions, greater amount of paperwork and red tape, and the higher cost of the overall adoption is deterring prospective adoptive parents. Our problem for the past several weeks has been trying to determine if we would be required to follow Hague requirements or non-Hague requirements for our adoption. We are American citizens (a Hague country) living in South Korea (a non-Hague country). We wanted to adopt from the United Sates but believed that we would have to follow Hague requirements which would involve our adoption following not just U.S. guidelines, but Korean ones as well. We decided to try going for an international adoption with Ukraine (a non-Hague country) so we would only have to follow Ukraine's adoption policies. (Do you see the headache yet?) The problem that arose with Ukraine is that they have several of their adoption policies before Parliament right now, including an age limit as to how young a child could be for an international adoption. We weren't comfortable with the possibility of adopting a child older than our biological daughter so we were back at square one. We sent emails to several agencies and advisors, we called agencies, we called a lawyer, none seemed to have any concrete answers for our specific situation. Then finally we were given the name of a very experienced social worker from Texas-so we emailed him, and guess what??? He was in Korea, but we didn't have a chance to meet with him personally. However he has assured us that we can infact adopt an American child while living overseas and it isn't even considered an international adoption! Thank you Randy Barlow. He will be returning to Korea in September, at which time we can either meet with him or have him complete our some study. I am not sure that we will be able to get all our medical, financial, and criminal (background check) paperwork in order as well as having the $1000+ for our first payment installment -so we will most likely just meet with him. Either way, please pray that God will continue to guide our steps and those with whom we will be working.

The Journey Begins...

So almost everyone knows at this point that our family is starting the process of trying to adopt. We've set up this blog so that everyone can follow our journey, it's up and downs and all the in-betweens. We will be posting about everything from finding an agency, applying, fundraising, government interaction, and the oh-so-scary home-study. It is our biggest wish that God will guide us in the entirety of this process and that all of you would vigilantly keep us in your prayers. So let the journey begin...