So this is where we are in our journey. We don't know. We are not lost, we know we are going to adopt a child, but we have several options before us. In a very dry and basic form they (in no particular order) are:
1) an independent (no agency) adoption from Ukraine. This would be a boy or girl age 5 or older and most likely with minor special needs (special needs is a very loose term we'll talk about later) We would be adopting a child out of a state run orphanage. An older child would be a more difficult transition for Abby.
2) A non-Hague adoption from South Korea, this sounds great because we are already living here but it is a huge commitment especially if we continue our ministry in Korea. The reason this is such a big deal is because adoption in Korea in general is not looked upon favorably and most families that adopt move to another city where no one knows they have adopted children. Our child would not have this option because, well, we aren't Korean and we don't look Korean.
3) A domestic adoption. This would be an adoption through a U.S. agency. (Yes I was supposed to use "a" there and not "an.") This type of adoption would be an infant adoption where a birth-mother chooses us to be the adoptive parents to her child. furthermore it would range from an open adoption to semi-open adoption to closed adoption.
4) Our family moves back to America, where we pursue a foster-to-adopt option. This would mean taking part in a state foster care system and eventually adopting a child that is a match with our family and is eligible for adoption. This is the least expensive type of adoption, however it can be emotionally draining as you love and let go non-adoptable children.
So that is where we are right now. We are taking it slow and are in continual prayer over the issue. We would like to send a special thanks to the folks that have taken the time to talk with us and who have been so very patient with all our many questions. I have to say though it is an understatement, adoption is complicated. We spent over an hour on the phone with a social worker named Jim McMahon from San Antonio, TX (1:30 am our time) who very patiently went through these different options with us and helped clarify some questions about our living overseas. So for now we pray and we ask all of you to join with us in prayer for the continued guidance and providence of God.
Good luck and best wishes with your decision. My husband Brian showed me your blog. We adopted 2 boys from Russia. It was a long, hard journey, but well-worth it.
ReplyDeleteFor me, the last two options you listed didn't appeal to us because of the lack of control we would have had in the process. International adoption had a lot of variables, but we knew that if we followed the process we had a much greater chance of emerging on the other side with a child who was no more or less deserving of a home than a US born child. Also, their birth parents have no means of inserting themselves into our lives without our invitation (which we have extended and have traded many letters with them) and that appealed to us as well.
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